The Marcolian Online

Mar. 1 , 2007

‘Reno 911’ should stay on the small screen
Jeremy Kopp
koppj@marietta.edu

If you've even read one of my reviews, you know I am a pretentious film snob. But that doesn't go to say I don't appreciate lowbrow humor, because I do. The thing is, I prefer the lowbrow-laughs to be backed with wit or some sort of intelligence, and the “laughs” in `Reno 911: Miami' are not.

Unfortunately, anyone who has seen Comedy Central's hilarious and inventive show - a mostly-improvised spoof on `COPS' documenting a handful of Reno, Nevada's biggest nitwit police in their attempts to keep the streets safe - will probably be interested in the big-screen adaptation.

But how do you adapt that concept to the silver screen? By offering a flimsy plot about a big cop convention in Miami and a major crises that leaves Reno's finest in charge of Miami law. And it's a horrible idea, because now `Miami' no longer feels like satire, but a dumbed-down `Police Academy.'

How dumb? The movie still believes it's a `COPS'-spoof because the cops continue to address the cameraman. But how much sense does a cameraman make when the movie opens with a dream sequence?

Okay, you're right, I'm being too picky. But take another early scene in which the cameraman secretly captures a distant shot of the hotel the cops are holed up at while in Miami. We see four or five of the cops in their individual hotel rooms masturbating. And nothing else happens, so that's the joke; they're masturbating. Har, har.

Not only is it dumb, it's tired and outdated. Take the sassy black cop who attempts to teach the nerdy white cop ebonics. Guess what? You won't see this coming…to black cop's surprise, the white cop drops the “n” word! Ho, ho.

Blah.

After five seasons of a still-funny show, I guess the producers wanted something a wee bit more grandiose. With a movie-sized budget that allows for a lot of explosions and an R-rating permitting gratuitous nudity and use of the `f' word, why not go all out and have fun with this thing, right?

Wrong. There are a few funny moments, but we've already seen them in the commercials. What the commercials don't tell us are how the film meanders (working so much better in a 30-minute format than in a full-length feature film), and how `Reno' has been reduced to scene after scene of people getting naked and cursing a lot and sometimes accidentally blowing stuff up for what would have been an excruciating 82 minutes if I'd sat the film out.
And I didn't. I had never walked out of a film in my life until `Reno 911: Miami.'

Hell, I even sat through `Gigli.' That's how much I hated, hated, hated, hated, hated, hated this movie, and I hate the talented cast and crew of `Reno' for selling out.


• Campus News • Viewpoints • Sports • Arts & Living • Greek wrap-up • Ask Marc • Spotlight • New faces at MC • Meet our staff • Staff profiles • Letters to the editor policy • History of the newspaper • Benefits of advertising • Ad rates		Mar. 1 , 2007 ‘Reno 911’ should stay on the small screen Jeremy Kopp koppj@marietta.edu If you've even read one of my reviews, you know I am a pretentious film snob. But that doesn't go to say I don't appreciate lowbrow humor, because I do. The thing is, I prefer the lowbrow-laughs to be backed with wit or some sort of intelligence, and the “laughs” in `Reno 911: Miami' are not. Unfortunately, anyone who has seen Comedy Central's hilarious and inventive show - a mostly-improvised spoof on `COPS' documenting a handful of Reno, Nevada's biggest nitwit police in their attempts to keep the streets safe - will probably be interested in the big-screen adaptation. But how do you adapt that concept to the silver screen? By offering a flimsy plot about a big cop convention in Miami and a major crises that leaves Reno's finest in charge of Miami law. And it's a horrible idea, because now `Miami' no longer feels like satire, but a dumbed-down `Police Academy.' How dumb? The movie still believes it's a `COPS'-spoof because the cops continue to address the cameraman. But how much sense does a cameraman make when the movie opens with a dream sequence? Okay, you're right, I'm being too picky. But take another early scene in which the cameraman secretly captures a distant shot of the hotel the cops are holed up at while in Miami. We see four or five of the cops in their individual hotel rooms masturbating. And nothing else happens, so that's the joke; they're masturbating. Har, har. Not only is it dumb, it's tired and outdated. Take the sassy black cop who attempts to teach the nerdy white cop ebonics. Guess what? You won't see this coming…to black cop's surprise, the white cop drops the “n” word! Ho, ho. Blah. After five seasons of a still-funny show, I guess the producers wanted something a wee bit more grandiose. With a movie-sized budget that allows for a lot of explosions and an R-rating permitting gratuitous nudity and use of the `f' word, why not go all out and have fun with this thing, right? Wrong. There are a few funny moments, but we've already seen them in the commercials. What the commercials don't tell us are how the film meanders (working so much better in a 30-minute format than in a full-length feature film), and how `Reno' has been reduced to scene after scene of people getting naked and cursing a lot and sometimes accidentally blowing stuff up for what would have been an excruciating 82 minutes if I'd sat the film out. And I didn't. I had never walked out of a film in my life until `Reno 911: Miami.' Hell, I even sat through `Gigli.' That's how much I hated, hated, hated, hated, hated, hated this movie, and I hate the talented cast and crew of `Reno' for selling out.
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