Apr. 19, 2007

Three-hour long double-feature keeps your attention from start to finish
Jeremy Kopp
koppj@marietta.edu

It's hard to resist dialogue like, “And now the missing leg has gone missing,” observed by the oblivious sheriff in Robert Rodriguez's zombie flick `Planet Terror,' the first of two films in the three-plus-hour-long celebration of tacky exploitation cinema called `Grindhouse.' The second feature, Quentin Tarantino's `Death Proof,' isn't as campy as its predecessor, but it's still fun in its nihilistic absurdity with its fast cars and hot girls.

Grindhouse theatres were popular in the 1970's, screening trashy, throwaway B-movies that were more concerned with big guns and big boobies than with coherent plots, respectable acting, or just artistic merit in general. And Rodriguez and Tarantino spent much of their childhoods indulging in the filth their own `Grindhouse' pays tribute to.

But then, what's so fun about `Planet Terror' is that it's less homage than satire, really, exaggerating the ridiculousness of, say, Rosario Dawson as Cherry, the one-legged go-go dancer with a massive gun replacing her missing limb so she can blows up hordes of zombies while performing stunning acrobatics.

There are a lot zombies to blow-up, too; it has something to do with a government experiment gone awry, or something, but that's not important. What is important is the way they die: as gorily and grotesque as possible. Also, it's worth paying attention to the dialogue, because it's intentionally bad, making it so good (Sheriff Hague's in particular, who delivered the line that opened this review).

Unfortunately, `Death Proof' is less of a thrill ride, despite that it's about the thrill of riding in fast cars. It contains about an hours worth of hot, sassy girls with the mouths of sailors talking about sex and pop culture (oh, and given Tarantino's foot fetish, we get a lot of shots of their feet, too).

I'm no expert on exploitation flicks, but this movie feels just like another Tarantino movie. At least things get more interesting when we meet Stuntman Mike (Kurt Russell). He's a serial killer with a “death proof” stunt car who stalks, seduces and ultimately kills young women by luring them into his car or by deliberately wrecking into them.

So the last 20-25 minutes is basically what the movie's all about; an exciting two-car road duel that involves real-life stuntwoman Zoe Bell (Uma Thurman's stunt-double in `Kill Bill') strapped to the hood of one car as Stuntman Mike attempts to run them off the road in his. It gets even more exciting when the ladies manage the upper hand, but overall, `Death Proof' seems almost lifeless next to `Planet Terror.'

Oh, and did I mentioned the trailers for the fake horror movies screened before and in-between the feature attractions? `Thanksgiving,' `Don't' `Werewolf Women of the S.S.' and my favorite, `Machete' (Cheech Marin as a shotgun-toting-priest who delivers lines like, “The Lord forgives; I do not!” and “You f***ed with the wrong Mexican!”). They're a lot of fun.

Just as fun are the way the films are shot, with their scratchy prints that sometimes cut in-and-out throughout; both movies are even missing entire reels of film to achieve a cheap, grindhouse-feel. And watch for the retro rainbow slides introducing the “prevues” and “feature attractions,” and the cheesy cartoons to remind the audience that these movies aren't for children.

Anyway, don't let my semi-discouraging review for `Death Proof' keep you from the `Grindhouse,' because `Planet Terror' and the fake trailers are worth the price of admission alone. `Planet Terror' (3 1/2 stars), `Death Proof' (2 1/2 stars) Average: 3 stars